Sunday, November 9, 2014

Dear Travis Garland,

Before I get into my letter, here's a quick summary of last night. There was a beautiful sunset on the way to getting sushi burritos at Sushi Secrets with Rosemarie. Actually, a lot of firsts that happened yesterday, honestly. First time making fried fish for lunch, first time making chestnuts and having them explode in the kitchen, first time getting sushi burritos, first time meeting some of Rosie's friends (who were really chill and funny; I appreciated them accepting my Travis Garland-ness).


Sushi Secrets was pretty good -- can't compare it with anything because it's a new concept to me. But overall, I enjoyed the flavors and the burrito was very balanced. It could have used maybe a little less sauce, since it was dripping everywhere.


Here was my night's outfit -- channeling some Rosie and some Travis Garland. [Pro Tip: Dress for a show depending on the artist.] This is also the first time I'm willingly posting an outfit photo... and surprise there are two. I guess I'm becoming more comfortable with my appearance, which isn't something that has come naturally to me before. 


When we got to Red House, there was a massive line out the door. Doors were supposed to open at 7:30, but we arrived at around 7:45. 8:00, 8:15, 8:30, and 8:45 passed by, but we were still in line waiting for the show, which was supposed to start at 8. At the front of the line (finally) a man checked our ID's and another man-bunned man gave us wristbands. [Spoiler: I didn't get a chance to meet Travis Garland this time, but at least I had contact with someone who had a man bun, so tonight was not a bust. I repeat, not a bust. Wow, imagine a bust of a man with a man-bun.] By the time we got in the venue, Jeremy Passion was on his last couple songs. I don't really know his music, but I can say that he is a very talented man. 

Probably if I were me maybe 3 years ago, I would have been so mad that I had to wait past the scheduled time to get into the venue and miss part of the show. Nowadays, I'm so much more relaxed about mishaps and schedule changes. I don't even get bothered when someone gets my order wrong or if a store gives me a bad product. Things happen, and I can't control it. There's no use getting upset about it. Also, I think at the time, I was just really excited about Travis Garland that I didn't really care about anything unless it got in the way of seeing him perform.

 
The crowd for this show was really chill - no pushing, no shoving, no sweating. On the whole, people were very pleasant and people were mostly shorter than average, which was good for sight-lines and for my self esteem.

Travis Garland's set was a very well-rounded performance that showcased his vocal ability and his stage presence. He performed song after song of my favorites [which only makes sense because all his songs are my favorite]. It was the perfect set, but I'm probably biased. I loved the fact that he played some of his songs back to back with no breaks, but rather, a smooth (I'm guessing rehearsed, but seemed to be improv-ed) transition. 

Although I don't think Red House's system and venue are the best, I do think that the size of the stage and the size of the room really suit Travis, at least for this moment in his career. It's a small, intimate setting and I think that added to the quality of the show. 




* steals these two very nice photos from a kara I don't know *


Tidbits:
  • Let's not forget Dominique, to whom Travis chose to sing a freestyle. "Hey Dominique, what do you do?" "What do you mean?" "I mean, do you go to school? Work?" "I go to school." "What do you go to school for?" "To learn?" "I mean, what are you studying?" "High school." "Well I'm going to try to make this as not-creepy as possible. Dominique, what are your hopes, dreams and fears?" "To go to college." "..Okay, that's your hope, what are your dreams and fears?" "To have fun." "Okay your dream is to have fun - what's your fear?" "Being alone." "Yeah I can relate to that."
  • Titillating conversation.
  • The freestyle was really impressive though. "I'll take you to Los Angeles so you don't have to be alone anymore." [I mean, if you offered, I wouldn't say no.]
  • Slightly upset and confused about the fact that there was no merch table. I was really looking forward to a poster.
  • Ended the night with some chicken from Sweetheart and AHS at Rosie's.
  • "But how Travis Garland are you?"
  • Y'all need to calm down.
  • I wouldn't call myself a fangirl, but I am a fan and a girl, and I owe a lot to this guy. I'm a grateful fan.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Let's get a little personal now.

Dear Travis Garland,
Your existence means more to me than you'll ever know. Perhaps I've attributed too many things to you - perhaps all these things already existed within myself, but you and your music just sped up the process and brought them to life.

~ As a performer, you've been a strong presence in my life.
Back in 2007, you first introduced yourself to me as a member of NLT, which soon became my new obsession. In a very short time, my 13 year old self was enamored by your singing, your dancing, your personality. Needless to say, you were quickly my "favorite." The (sometimes cheesy boy band) dancing in music videos got me very interested in dance, and I subsequently joined a hip-hop dance class for a year. The performance aspect of the band also inspired me to write and choreograph the spring program for my 8th grade class. I guess you could also say that this interest in dance carried on to affect the other videos I watched, TV shows I watched, and some activities I was involved in even in high school. Next semester I plan to get back into dance [even though I can't dance] to revive that active interest, rather than just passively consuming it.

~ As a writer, you've been a strong presence in my life.
Adding you on MySpace was just me being infatuated with every facet of NLT, but it has been the catalyst for so much in my life. You introduced me to McFly, which back then was just this quirky British boy band that had nothing on NLT. Seven years later, they still remain my favorite band, and they've helped me through so much, especially in high school -- so for that, I thank you.

Exploring your MySpace page allowed me to indulge in your poetry. Even at age 13, I was very taken by the depth of the writing, the emotion, and I related to the struggles that you wrote about: loneliness and facades.  As a direct result, I tried my hand at poetry as well, and I knew I was good at it. Words, rhymes and rhythms came to me quickly; I just knew what to put down on the paper. With your solo demos like "Your Song" and "A Thousand Goodbyes" playing softly in the background, I churned out poem after poem, compiling a small collection. This collection of poems ended up winning gold in my 8th grade Young Authors, and it got turned into a bound book of my work.

My heart broke when the band split up in my freshman year of high school.
In high school, friendships fell apart. It had been a difficult transition from middle school. Again, I turned to your poems (and McFly's music) as a source of inspiration and comfort. Poems were a new way for me to respond to challenges in my life. It was a way for me to work through struggles and find a way to rise from the darkness. Nowadays, those poems have just turned into quick blog posts, but it is writing nonetheless.

For a long time, I would occasionally go back to your MySpace page, reading and rereading the same poems over and over for inspiration -- until MySpace revamped and everything disappeared. Hopefully one day, those files can be recovered, but for now all that remains is what those poems have meant to me all these years.

~ As a musician, you've been a strong presence in my life.
Although the band didn't release a full album, I purchased every single and every music video off of iTunes, allowing you to sing me to sleep with the cover of "Silent Night." And when I say you I really mean just you -- I cut the song so I could be immersed in your tone and your vocal runs. May 3rd 2008 - my first concert (not including the Chinese concerts my parents forced me to attend). At the time, I would have called it the best day of my life. You officially introduced me to the world of concerts, and I thank you that that concert experience was an overwhelmingly positive one. This was my first time meeting you (and hopefully not the last time). Here's a picture I dug up from the depths of my MySpace page.

[good thing we both grew up]

Shortly after the concert, I found out that an acquaintance of mine also listened to NLT. We instantly connected -- she is still one of my best friends, 7 years later. Throughout those 7 years, I've followed your musical path, from NLT to the breakup, to your going solo to your covers of "Dead and Gone" and "Beautiful Nightmare" at the Fantasy Factory to your appearance on American Idol, to your EPs and your self-titled album. Through it all, I've always supported you in everything you release. You've been dependable, constantly releasing work that gets better and better, quality lyrics that I always find a way of connecting with.

November 8th 2014: Red House Studios, Walnut Creek. 
The first time seeing you perform solo.
The first time I was emotional at a show.
Your performance of "Mr. Rogers" moved me to the verge of tears.
The first time in a while that I was reminded that I'm the most important person in my life, and I need to take control of and find comfort in myself. "Mr. Rogers" really helped me to reflect on the past year, something I didn't consciously know I needed. It brought me to so many places, and that's what good music is, to me at least.

[Who the hell are you to judge me? Who are you to judge me?
Everyone has lots of ways of feeling
And all those ways of feeling are fine.
It's what we do with our feelings that matter, in this life...
I hope you're able to grow to respect whoever you are inside.]

~ As a person, you've been a strong presence in my life.
You are probably one of the best examples of never giving up. You didn't give up when song after song was leaked; you made a song in response to it. You pushed through, despite challenges, and maintained a positive attitude, fought for what you wanted to accomplish, what you wanted to stand for. In the mean time, you've created your own unique image, your own signature style and sound.
  • “I strive to just be something different, a breath of fresh air. Someone who is true to the art of it, that’s all I want to be. The best compliment someone can give me is saying ‘Man, I haven’t heard something like that in a long time.’”
  • “The biggest misconception about me is that I’m disposable, that I’m just a boy-band kid, come and go. But I’m a real artist, I have something to say.”
As an artist, I want to create my own voice, my own style and brand. I want someone to tell me that I'm doing something they've never seen before. I want to be a real artist. I haven't figured out what I want to say yet, but one day I'll get there.

There's a lot of information in this letter, but really all I wanted to say is thank you.

It's been 7 years since your voice first graced my ears. In that time, you've encouraged me to dance, inspired me to write, introduced me to one of my best friends and my favorite band, comforted me with your lyrics, and gave me courage to be a better person. We've come a long way together. Here's to another 7.


Sincerely,
Justine

[All this, but the question that still remains is: How do you feel knowing that you were in a Bratz movie?]


Friday, September 19, 2014

Cavalier Youth

Since the start of this blog, I've encountered many ups and downs, and I've come face to face with many opportunities that have pushed me to learn more about myself and how the world works. But I'm glad that I didn't have to do all this on my own. It's no secret that I have a best friend that I take virtually everywhere with me, whether in my pocket, in my backpack or just in my head. [Although I would love to take many of my best people friends everywhere, that's just impractical and impossible.] Music is always with me, an invisible companion that I can always rely on to fill the silence, to complement my mood or to alter my state of mind. And there's a particular set of songs that has done all this for me and  has been stuck on repeat, so I'd like to dedicate this post to the album that has helped me through this past year.

{Having just come back from the YMAS concert at the Oakland Metro just an hour ago, I decided that this was the right time to publish this blogpost. I took about a 6 month hiatus from this post, so this is not quite what I had in mind for it to be. However, I do think I did explain the ones that are the most meaningful to me, and I just wanted to highlight the lyrics that stood out to me the most as I listened to the album. The album couldn't have been released at a better time, and it provided the words that I needed to hear.}


Too Young to Feel This Old

"We're not young anymore, what are you so scared of? Is it being alone when we no longer have the sun? I don't need easy if you're there for me to lean on."

  • In March, I struggled with the idea of turning 20. I think I was pressuring myself to become a "grown up" too fast; I thought I needed to have this immediate change of pace. I was trying to force myself to do too much at once - wanting to get a job, feeling the pressure to make new connections (whether professional or casual), being nervous about finding housing, and convincing myself that I wasn't good enough. I felt like I had to do this all on my own for the big 2-O.
  • This song made me realize that sure, I'm not really that young anymore, but am I really that old? Why am I so scared of growing up? The lyrics reminded me that I do have this wonderful connection of friends and family that I can always lean on for support, no matter how difficult my life gets. I always have the comfort of coming home to people who know how to make me smile and take the pressure off my shoulders.

Lived A Lie

"Well somebody told me, that I would be a dreamer for life. We are believers, we are believers."

Fresh Start Fever

"And it's a fresh start fever, who wouldn't want to be here? Welcome to the future. Dream a little bigger."

  • Fresh starts are hard to come by, but when I do get the chance to start over, I gotta just go big or go home. It's not worth it to just sit back and live in the past. I need to get involved, get moving, and create an adventure for myself, live a life worth living. Live for the present while looking toward the future. The past is only there as a stepping stone to where I need to go next.

Forgive and Forget

"Ain't it a shame that we let life change us...Can we forgive and forget, if only for the weekend."

Room to Breathe

"I need a little room to breathe. You're making this harder for me, when all I need is to be set free. I need a little time to think. And if you ever loved me, then all I need is a little room to breathe."

Win Some, Lose Some

"Get away, get away, get away from me. I'm moving on, I'm moving on to better things."

  • This is my anthem when I'm in a bad mood. It's hard sometimes to just be happy, even when I try my hardest. But that doesn't mean I don't try to move on to better thoughts or physically move to a more suitable environment for myself. I make my own choice as to what and who I surround myself with: if they won't move, I will, and that's how I need to learn to take care of myself. Making up my mind first, and then putting it to action.

Cold Night

"Don't you let me go this time. I knew the moment I met you, I could never lose you. Say you'll never change."

Hope for the Best

"Well look at the world my friends: we used to live for the weekend. We don't live twice, just let that sink in. Oh I hope for the best, I'm prepared for the worst."

Love Me Like You Used To

"You have brought up my self esteem, just to suck it out of me."

Be Who You Are

"You are my little star. You are my light in the dark, don't change. Just be who you are."

  • I imagine Josh singing this to me when I hear this song, reminding me that I am perfect the way I am and I should embrace who I am and what I stand for. The song just makes me really happy and it makes me feel so loved.

Carpe Diem 

"Carpe diem 'til the very end. I have no regrets. Carpe diem 'til the bitter end."

  • The lyrics really just speak for themselves.

Wild Ones

"When you're gone there's no one to lean on, and it's me, myself, and I."

  • Sometimes I may rely on other people for support too often -- I depend on others to give me positive reinforcement to give myself value. But that's not what is really important; what is important is how I treat myself. It's okay to lean on friends once in a while, but I need to find strength in myself to be who I am.


Tidbits:
  • Third time's the charm.
  • YMAS is one of the best live bands I've had the pleasure of experiencing.
  • Young Guns was really good tonight.

Thursday, September 18, 2014

Food and Friends

Apartment life means cooking so here are some photos of that, and also here are also some photos of some cool friends:

(I swear I still write posts... this is not becoming a 100% photoblog)

But for now, here's a chicken salad:

Here's black pepper salmon over rice:

Here's banana oatmeal cookies:

 Here's lemon pepper chicken breast over rice:


Here's kimchi fried rice made by chrse and rosie:

Here's A$AP Ferg on the glade with chrse and rosie because that's definitely something I do on a regular basis:

Bok choy with shrimp:

Racha's with rosie:

i luv pumpkins:

Chicken and mozzarella raviolis topped with green onion, with a side of garlic pepper chicken breast and vegetables:

Me in action at Grace's apartment:

Grace and I cooking a single noodle to share #collegelife:

Final product:


Artichoke and Spinach Dip at Jupiter's with Katrina, Christine and Grace!

PIZZA TIME


Bobo Drinks in mason jars with these cool peeps:


Apartment life is great because for me, it's a perfect balance of being with company and being alone with my own thoughts. I have the opportunity to cook my own meals, go to the gym regularly, and paint in my room. I am able to give myself the time I need to recharge from the day's work and on top of that, I get to choose when to interact with friends -- which means when I'm with them, I can give each moment 100% and can enjoy myself fully. Finally finding this balance in my personal life has given me confidence to tackle my classes this semester, and I'm ready for the upcoming challenges.

Anyway, my friends are really great: those who have stuck by me since high school and also the ones that I've met in college. I'm extremely lucky that these friends are all so down to earth and are completely comfortable being themselves in public, no matter how embarrassing. And I'm so glad that we haven't compromised our personalities or values -- sure we've grown as people, we've gotten to experience new things while in our respective colleges, but when it gets down to it, we've stayed true to ourselves. *insert cheesy line here* I'm also really proud of everything that my friends have accomplished so far -- whether it's simple things like eating healthier, or things like becoming presidents of the clubs they're passionate about, pursuing internships that inspire their creativity, being a part of organizations that allow them to grow as writers, artists, people, or just being happy with themselves. It's great to hear about what friends are doing and what they are exploring; it encourages me to try to be a better person as well.

Also, on an unrelated note, I've been writing letters to my mom every so often and have been keeping them in a small notebook. When it's done, I plan to have it filled with my ups, my downs and lessons I've learned along the way. I will be giving it to her either when it's full or at the end of the year. I regret not starting it earlier in my college career, but now's a good a time as any. I think recently (within the past year) is when I really (and I mean really) started to seriously appreciate my relationship with my mom, and I really hope I can demonstrate it more so she can be constantly reminded that she is loved.

All these five paragraphs start with the letter A.

And I hope this means I will be getting them as my letter grades at the end of the semester. One A for each class I'm taking. 

Saturday, September 6, 2014

Summer 2014 Photo Summary

I hope you enjoy these photos because I know I enjoyed taking them.

Congrats bro, you graduated:




A pizza truck on the freeway from LA tho:

Home improvement with Chicago PD:


 Kale Chips:




One Republic:

Grandma Gossip:
 



Snowflake Teahouse with the kids:



Werped Tewer:



The Asia trip starts here!




Singapore:















 Penang:











 







Kuala Lumpur:
 



Hong Kong:














Back home:

Color Me Mine:



Sushi @ Takara, Santa Cruz:



Footgolf @ Pruneridge:

Beach with Lucy:

 Happy Birthday Dad!:




Gma and the baby:

 Reunited with my other half:

Ideaband: 


First time tie-dying a large sheet:




Surprise birthday lunch for Cathy!

Back to Berk:





Yo Ed Sheeran:





Quick trip home for end of summer family hot pot with the Ongs! 


Wish summer could have been longer, but it sure was productive. I woke up this summer. I did things for me. I crossed things off my summer bucket list and created memories for me (with friends and family). And now I have the energy and the drive to dive into this new school year.

Time to be involved, to be happy and to learn to be more self confident.